Subtitle: Do I Matter? An Adoptee’s Perspective through Her Relationships

Late one evening in 2011, my mother confided the truth to me: that my biological father held three different professions. I slept peacefully and relieved that night believing that my biological father was a famous person. I was ecstatic to have finally found my truth. The following morning, I received a page-long email in my inbox from my German cousin, Ina, who lived in Berlin. I’d recently turned 51. Throughout her lengthy email she explained that she always knew about my adoption. I’d never discussed my adoption with anyone and she’d simply assumed that I not only knew but was OK with it. She then shared something related to her mother Helga. When my mother was pregnant with me, she wanted my Aunt Helga to talk some sense into my biological father by telling him that he had a child coming. My biological father responded to my Aunt, “I don’t want to have anything to do with her or the child.”

I learned that he was a handsome tall, blond-haired and blue-eyed American soldier. Proud of such an honorable profession, I confirmed my lankiness and blue eyes. I also learned that I spent the first year of my life in an orphanage. Every weekend my mom and non-biological father picked me up on Friday and returned me Sunday evenings. This was the very first time that I learned I was an orphan for the first year of my life. I felt so sorry for “little” Carina. I hated the word orphan or orphanage, and I refrained from using it. I recalled the sudden tears during my late night’s work and a sense of abandonment. As I walked down a long corridor back to my bedroom, I pictured a little girl walking down a corridor crying, “Please don’t leave me.”

At long last, I’d finally found my truth; and, knowing it, I felt grateful. In addition, I discovered the gift of my true identity. I was no longer a nomad with no identity. I’m devoted to serving other adoptees come to terms with their adoption and flourish with this knowledge.

In May of 2011, shortly after my conversation with Mom regarding what really happened, she confided in me that her pride stood in the way of her telling me the truth. She wanted me to respect her; but she only felt shame. I told Mom that I forgave her and that she must forgive herself to move forward. I also reminded her that Dad accepted her without any questions. I recognized his deep love for her. Mom immediately told me that Dad never asked any questions. When he met me, it was love at first sight.

My book guides you along an adoptee’s journey and nurtures love in order to help you overcome feelings of anger and betrayal.  carina-book-imageIn gratitude for having you here, you can sign up for my guide book,  3 Most Important Truths When Talking About Adoption. I encourage you to share it with others as well. >>Sign up here<<

Praise for

                                        3 Most Important Truths When Talking About Adoption 

“Carina! Thank you for sharing! I think what is most appealing about you and (for me) comes through in your writing is that you really, truly, speak from the heart. Especially from my perspective– being adopted, struggling with my own truths about my family and biological father, I know I can relate to much of your story. But even outside of that– reading your writing feels like a conversation, like I’ve known you for years– which is something I find to be one of the most important aspects of a writer. People want to feel connected and you have that grace that pulls your reader in and makes it intimate and comforting to read your story.”~ Nickcole W.

Burns-JewelryBox CVR

Praise for

The Syrian Jewelry Box: A Daughter’s Journey for Truth

“Carina Burns has looked within herself, faced her demons, and developed the courage to share her journey of love, perceived betrayal, angst, and regenerative love. I first knew Carina before she learned of her adoption. She was a typical carefree teenager enjoying the ‘good life’ of a third-culture expatriate kid. Only recently have I reconnected with her. She has quite a story, a gift she shares with passion. Carina Burns is truly ‘becoming’ in every way imaginable.”~ Richard Maack, junior high school principal, Saudi Arabia

 

 

Carina’s memoir, The Syrian Jewelry Boxis a beautifully expressed story from an adopted child written in a manner which will help bring contentment and comfort to all adopted readers.”~ Anthony J. Zamarchi, Sr., Raytheon Middle East Systems

For future publication and purchasing information, please visit Carina’s website.  >>here<<

Original Syrian Jewelry Box

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